The fatman chronicles--all hope renounce, ye lost, who enter here

"If the FEC makes rules that limit my First Amendment right to express my opinion on core political issues, I will not obey those rules."--Patterico's Pledge

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Fore!

(Best to imagine the following being spoken in a thick, Irish brogue.)

Casey steps into the confessional, kneels, and says to Father Murphy "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have taken the Lord's name in vain while playing golf."

Father Murphy: "I understand, me boy. I play a little meself, so I know how frustrating it can be. Tell me what happened."

Casey: "On the very first hole, I hit my tee shot 300 yards straight down the fairway, pretty as you please. But when it landed, it hit a sprinkler head and ricocheted into the rough."

Father Murphy: "A true pity, me boy. Tell me, is that when you took the Lord's name in vain?"

Casey: "No, Father. On me second shot, I hit a 2 iron that was a thing of beauty. It was headed straight for the green when it struck a bird flying overhead and caromed into a bunker."

Father Murphy: "Terrible luck, me boy, just terrible. Was that when you took the Lord's name in vain?"

Casey: "No, Father. I took me sand wedge and I blasted that ball out of that bunker and onto the green and it rolled straight towards the hole and stopped two inches short of the cup."

Father Murphy: "I don't understand, Casey. It looks like your luck was turning for the better there. Was that when you took the Lord's name in vain?'

Casey: "No, Father. I_

Father Murphy: J**** H. C*****! Don't tell me you missed a G** D*** two inch putt!!!